Teenage years are full of amazing stories, including love stories. Being a teenager, you probably start noticing some cute boys at school. Or perhaps, that cute boy that other girls have been talking about is asking for your phone number! When it happens, in no time he will be asking if you want to hang out together after school, and the rest is history. However, we can understand if you start to think about how to talk to your Dad about a boy at school that you are currently hanging out with.
In order to do that, first, you need to remember that the connection between a father and his daughter is one-of-a-kind. No matter how old you are, you will always be daddy’s little girl. So when it’s time for dad to find out that his little girl is seeing a boy, it’s not gonna be easy for him to take. Therefore, we are here to help you with 12 useful tips on how to talk to your dad about a boy.
1. Be Honest
Honesty is the most crucial aspect when it comes to talking to your dad about a boy. In fact, it’s not only about a boy but also about everything, well.. maybe ‘almost’ everything. Before you start talking to him, do bear in mind that you must let him know that you are telling him the truth. Plus, you also need to be open about this particular boy.
This way, your dad will start to understand the fact that you are a teenager now. It also means that you can let him know that you are starting to be responsible for your own actions, especially in terms of living your life as a teenager to the fullest. Being a father, he would expect you to know about some of the most important things about dating a boy, so it’s crucial to be honest and open to him.
2. Practice Makes Perfect
Talking to your dad can be very difficult, especially if it’s related to sensitive subjects like grades, or boyfriend or girlfriend. Furthermore, it gets even harder when you’re starting to be a teenager and facing new excitements in life. You have to remember that it’s not easy for parents to accept the fact that their baby girl is now a teenager. Plus, accepting the fact that their little girl has a boyfriend!
Since you need to be ready to accept your dad’s response after you told him about a boy, why don’t you try to practice beforehand? You can prepare the key messages plus how you want the message to be delivered, and practice in front of a mirror. Each word and sentence really does matter when it comes to sensitive subjects. After all, practice makes perfect, right?
3. Write a Text
If you’re unsure that you can talk smoothly and explain your points clearly in front of your dad, you can try other methods. This is important because it will be the first time for you to tell him about a boy. So, text communication can be a good option as well. Since there are lots of ways to pick, you can either email him, write him a letter, or even talk to him via instant messaging app.
If your dad is pretty welcoming about it, then you can continue the discussion face-to-face afterwards. Text messaging can help to hide your fear of your dad being angry, and it can even hide the fact that you’re actually nervous, but still can deliver your points clearly.
4. Tell Mom First
Telling your dad about a boy is a challenging thing to do, especially if you have a strict dad. You can probably guess what his reaction would be, even before you start talking. If that’s the case, talking to mom first can be a great idea. She will give you a better perspective from a woman’s point of view, while being the person who knows your dad the most.
You will be surprised to hear some useful tips on how to talk to your dad about a boy from her. In fact, you might even hear some sweet stories on how your mom met your dad in the process. After all, a mom will always understand about her daughter’s lovelife. Plus, if you can share more sneak peek about your boy to your mom, she will help in setting up the ground family rules about dating, too!
5. Choose a Private Place to Talk
Since you’re going to tell your dad about a sensitive subject, then it would be wise for you to choose a nice and private place to do it. Of course, you don’t want to have the conversation while you’re at the mall or the church, right? Find a nice place to sit down together that will let you talk freely and have a better understanding of what your dad has to say about it.
You can take your dad to your favorite coffee shop nearby, or ask him for an afternoon walk in the park. If your dad happens to love staying at home during his spare time, the front porch at home can be a nice place to talk as well. You can also make him a nice cup of coffee or tea, and start the conversation with a simple yet clear opening sentence, “Dad, I want to tell you about this boy..”
6. Find the Perfect Timing
Timing is everything. For you dad, knowing that you have a new boy in your life means that he has a new so-called competitor, in a cute way of course. That’s why it will actually be a huge thing for your dad. After all, knowing that you’ve been daddy’s little girl, it’s not going to be easy for him to know that you have a boyfriend.
Therefore, you need to make sure that you pick the right timing to talk to your dad about your boyfriend. The best time is when your dad is free from work or any activity that can make him feel tired or stressful. For instance, you can talk to him during or after dinner, or on weekends when he is free from work and able to give his full attention to what you’re going to say.
7. Pay Attention to His Mood
After you set the perfect timing, the next useful tip on how to talk to your dad about a boy is to pay attention to his mood. This is something that you also need to consider, because his mood can affect the final result of your mission. So, you need to see and assess his emotional condition before you come to him and say, “Dad, can I talk to you about something?”
No need to rush things because good things take time. We believe that if he’s in a good mood, then he would love to hear what you have to say, and would want to know more about this boy that you’re talking about. No matter what happens, any dad would be happy to know that his baby girl is growing up beautifully. Moreover, he’s going to be proud to know that you have grown to be an open and honest teenager.
8. Be Prepared for Questions
The last thing that you also need to be very sure about, is that you need to be prepared for any kinds of questions that your dad might ask. Since the topic is about the boy that you’re seeing, then you need to know everything about his background.
Being a protective dad, some questions that he raises might include, “how did you meet him?, where does he live?, or what makes you think that he’s good for you?” Furthermore, he might also ask you to invite the boy over because your dad wants to get to know him better.
9. Listen to Them, Too
Although you really want your dad to be happy knowing that you have a boyfriend now, you also need to listen to what he has to say about it. It’s good to show him that you are mature enough to have a boyfriend, which will convince your dad even more if you listen carefully to his ‘dating’ advice and also opinions about your boyfriend. We do know for sure that he has quite a lot of advice for his teenage girl about teen boys, as he used to be one himself!
Facing the reality that his baby daughter is now grown up is one thing, but knowing that his daughter is showing signs of maturity will give him another set of relief. So, make sure you listen more, and try to understand his point of view.
10. Avoid Arguments
In a normal discussion, having an argument is necessary to prove your points. But when it comes to talking to your dad, especially about a boy that you’re currently seeing, an argument is something to avoid. There’s no point in arguing with your dad. After all, every dad would want the best for their daughters, right?
When talking with your dad, try to keep everything positive. Most importantly, don’t be defensive! Avoid using words that can provoke him, and lower your voice down.
11. Drop Some Hints
If you think that you’re still not ready to tell your dad directly about this boy that you’re seeing, you can drop some hints. When we say hints, it means that you can somehow do something that will make your parents wonder. For instance, you can talk on the phone a little longer than usual while talking slowly. You can also stay out a little late and tell them that you are hanging out with a friend, or by mentioning his name during conversations with them.
After some time, your dad will probably notice some changes in your behavior, and will start to think that you have a boyfriend. Being a protective dad, there is a possibility that he will ask you directly about it, or might also ask your mom to talk to you first. If so, then you can act like you’re surprised that they know and say, “Oh my God, how did you know that?.”
12. Ask Someone to Do It for You
As the last tip that might come useful for you, you can ask someone to do the talking for you. This tip would apply for those of you who are too afraid to talk to your dad directly about a boyfriend. So if that’s the case, you can ask someone else to do it for you. You can ask your siblings, your best friend, or even your mom to do it. Although in the end, sooner or later you will need to face your dad as well. But at least, this tip can save you from the fear of seeing your dad’s reaction when he finds out.
One thing to note, there is a reason why we put this one on the end of our list. It’s because we highly suggest that you talk to your dad directly, as it will be something to strengthen your bond with him, while showing him that you are responsible for your own actions.
Now that you know about several important tips on how to talk to your dad about a boy, we do hope that we can set you free from worrying about how he would react. Being a teenager is fun, and it’s a great phase for you to start communicating with your parents as an adult. On the other hand, it’s also important for you to show that you are responsible for your decision about dating someone. So, good luck!
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FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)
How do I tell my dad about a boy?
Since it’s actually a sensitive subject, we have collected some of the most important tips on how to talk to your dad about a boy. Just go through the list above, and you might find some useful tips on how to start talking with your dad. First and foremost, you need to be honest and open with him.
How do you tell your parents you have a boy?
You can set a time to sit down together with them, and slowly explain to them about your boyfriend, and the reason why you’re interested in him. Then, you can continue by sharing some positive things about him. Ask about their opinions, and ask if they have any good advice to help you set the ground rules for dating in your teenage years.
How do you introduce your dad to a boy?
Give your dad the proper opening about your boyfriend, including his character, his personality, his family background, so when it’s time for you to invite him to meet your dad, you dad would have the proper reference about your boy’s background.
How do you tell your dad you have a crush?
Instead of just telling him, “dad, I have a crush!,” it would be a wise idea to tell him that as a teenager, you are starting to be responsible about your decision about having a feeling for someone. You might also want to show him the photo of your crush, which will help you in terms of digging your dad’s opinion about him.
Over the years, I have seen my fair share of teenage issues. I have also seen plenty of worried parents at a loss of what to do with their children.
My aim with Talking Teenage is to put a stop to this and help you to communicate with your teenagers better. This will leave you with a better relationship and help you to keep such a close bond.
Please take the time to read my website and learn anything you can - we were all teenagers once!
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