Let’s have a discussion about annoying kids today. Like it or not, children often act up and develop certain behaviors that often drive the parents crazy overtime. It leads to the question every parent asks themselves at least once in their lifetime: why is my son so annoying?
But before we jump to the practical tips on how to deal with annoying kids, we may need to determine what is annoying? Is it a certain behavior they do that is considered as impolite and unmannered, or is it just us finding that their behavior annoying?
After taking a deeper look at some studies on what makes children annoying, the answers are often linked to the parents. So open your mind and brace yourself because some of the following reasons may call you out.
1. Craving for Attention
Just like other problematic behavior, children often try to get their parents’ attention with different methods. It can be a tantrum, crying, and acting annoying. They may do it intentionally in the hope you will finally turn to them and ask them what’s up. This is why you need to make time for them whether it is just play or chat.
2. Avoiding Things
They may act annoying in order to avoid certain things you ask them to do. Children don’t like so many things such as brushing their teeth or putting on their shoes. In order to escape that obligation, they may act annoying to distract you. Don’t give up on their annoying behavior or it will develop into something even worse in the future.
3. Trying to Get a Sensory Stimulation
Some kids do annoying things such as kicking their feet into the table constantly or won’t stop rolling on the floor. This can be an indication that they need constant sensory stimulation and they try to get it in the simplest way they understand. You can introduce them to alternative activities that will fulfill their stimulation needs. There are some toys available in the market providing them with stimulus. You can also make a DIY sensory board to keep them busy.
4. Attempting to Get Reward
Your children may come up at you one day asking for a phone or a fancy toy. They may even claim that all of their friends already have it. But you may won’t just believe them and give it right away. Instead, you ask them to wait. They may think that by acting annoying, you will give the reward right away. But please don’t give up. They need to learn that some things are worth waiting for.
5. You Give Them Punishment with No Explanation
Do you often use the punishment chair or the bad boy badge or ask them to go to the corner? A healthy amount of punishment is necessary to teach them consequences of their actions. However, if you don’t explain as to why they get the punishment, they will think that you just like to put them in the corner. You can try to explain why certain behaviors are unacceptable and why you have to give them the time out. You can also explain how to not do it again in the future.
6. They Get a Form of Punishment That Triggers Them
While a little punishment may be necessary, you also need to be careful of your actions. For example, if your kids play too many games and you take the console as punishment, it will trigger them, making them angrier and more annoying. If you have to take their favorite things as a form of punishment, be sure that you do it in a mild manner and explain that they can have it back once they understand and learn from their mistakes.
7. You’re Over Tolerating Their Behavior
The way you react to their actions especially in the early stage of their development has a huge impact on their behavior in the future. For example, if you over tolerate their annoying behavior at a younger age, they will think that it is normal and actually okay to keep doing it. You need to set a standard rule and apply it consistently from their early development to form a strong base.
8. You Make Them Feel Guilty without Proper Explanation
Ever give them the silent treatment? It is understandable that parenting is exhausting and sometimes you just don’t have enough energy to speak. But silent treatment can make your son feel incredibly guilty. And it will be even worse if you don’t follow up with the much needed explanation as to why you’re being upset. As a response, they may act annoying to get you to speak to them.
9. You Told Them What to Do but Don’t Set an Example
Well, of course, parents often have to tell their kids what to do. But maybe, before setting rules or asking them to behave in a certain way, you also need to take a look at yourself. Do you do as you say? Children see their parents as mentors and they will copy your behavior. Instead of just telling them what to do, you can show them how to do it and maybe follow the rules together.
10. You don’t Tell Them the Truth
In a lot of opportunities, maybe you have to tell them some white lies. But you need to know that lies often reveal themselves at some point. When your son knows they’ve been lied to, it can leave them feeling betrayed. They may have harder times to believe in you and act annoying as a response. Even though while lies seem harmless, you may also take a different approach and give them reasonable explanations instead.
11. Too Much Reward
In this busy modern world, sometimes it is just easier to give children what they want. When they cry or ask for your time, you may give them the ipad instead because you still have so much to do. This approach may be effective and save time. But it will give them instant gratification. They may intentionally act annoying so they can have more screen time, and so on.
12. You Always Give Them What They Want
Parents don’t always have enough patience to deal with children who act up. The pressure can be even heavier when they throw a tantrum in public. As a response, you may give them what they want instantly to make them stop. They will remember how you give up so easily on public space or when other people are around. And they will repeat it to get what they want.
13. You Always Cover Up for Their
No matter how much you love him and you always want to protect him, he still needs to face the consequences of their actions. Just because you love him, doesn’t mean you have to always cover up for him. If your son is annoying and refuses to do their homework, don’t stay up late and do their homework. Let them go to school and face their consequences.
14. Your Son is Being Too Emotionally Attached to You
There’s a phase when a child alway only wants “Mommy”. It was tolerable when they were younger. But when they grow older and they still only want mommy, it can be a problem. They may develop an unhealthy attachment towards you and having to spend time with other family members can be irritating for them. This is why it is good to introduce them to other family members such as grandparents and aunt at an early age.
15. They Have no Better Things to Do
Kids have so much energy and they need to channel it in some ways. When they have nothing to do, they may make up things and the result can be annoying for you. Providing them with stimulating toys and activities will keep them busy and act less annoying. You can even DIY some projects for them to do and change it daily so it will always be interesting for them.
16. They Feel Uncomfortable
They can also act up when they feel uncomfortable. The causes vary. It can be an itchy fabric of the clothes they’re wearing, the weather is too hot or too cold, or they may feel sick. The problem is, sometimes children don’t know how to communicate it to you and. Their annoying act may just be a way they do to try to get your attention so you will notice the problem. Ask them nicely what’s the problem and what you can do to help.
17. They’re Just Being Curious
Children are curious creatures. They want to know about everything that crosses their way. They may ask you endless questions from the time they get up to the time they go to bed and it can be incredibly annoying. But it is just natural and they can help it. You can provide them with educational material and tell them to wait until you get your job done if they have any questions. But you need to keep your words and actually spare time to answer their questions.
18. They Haven’t Understand The Concept of Respecting Others
During their learning process, they may haven’t grasped more complex ideas such as respect. If your children act annoying, they may just not understand that their behavior may disturb others. This is the right teachable moment when you can explain the concept of rights and boundaries so they can behave properly in the future. And there is no better way to teach this kind of concept other than through examples.
19. They Insist on Satisfying Reaction
When you’re busy and your son is asking for your attention, you may not give them an immediate response. But children are impatient and when they want to know something, they want to get a satisfying reaction right away. It can be hard especially for busy moms who do it all. But giving them the proper reaction can be a way to reduce the annoying behavior.
20. The Put Up A Show
If you didn’t notice already, children are basically drama queens. They take things to the top and often exaggerate everything. They also have a huge need for attention and they are willing to put up a show in order to gain more attention. This can also be the reason why your son is so annoying. Give them proper attention and spare some time to focus on them will make them feel recognised and act not so annoying anymore.
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How do I deal with an annoying son?
There are some things you can do to deal with an annoying son. For example, giving them the right amount of attention will significantly reduce annoying behavior. You may also need to give them alternative activities to keep them busy and give them stimulus. The most important thing to remember is do not give up too easily and spoil their annoying behavior.
How do I stop my child from being annoying?
It is a long learning process and you may need to try different methods before getting the answer. If your children act annoying in order to get what they want but you have good reason as to why not give it to them, just ignore them. Giving them instant gratification will only encourage their annoying behavior and they may develop it into a habit.
What is the most annoying kid age?
The most annoying kids are usually toddlers aged 1 to 5. They already have desires and know a thing or two, but haven’t developed communication skills properly. When the feel something or want something, they may express it through cries, tantrums, or annoying acts. They will be better when they grow older but you need to make sure that you give them the proper reaction and education.
Why is my child being obnoxious?
There are a lot of reasons as to why your child is obnoxious. They may haven’t understood the concept of annoying so they aren’t even aware that their acts may annoy people around them. One big reason that makes children obnoxious are lack of attention and insecurities. You need to pay attention to the triggers to better understand the root cause.